The Hard Part

As much as I’ve traveled over the years, I’ve had doubts about this trip.  Will I have enough money?  Can I make it a whole year?  (It seems like not enough time one moment and too long the next.)  What if I really hate volunteering?  How sick will I get? (not “Will I get sick?” because I know I will).  Will I be lonely?  Will I get tired of meeting new people?  How bad will the heat be?  How bad will my Spanish be?  There are so many things to worry about, but for me, that’s just part of the adventure (easy for me to write that now as I sit outside on my deck in Rhode Island on a beautiful summer night).  I know from past travels that there will be a lot of frustration and challenges throughout this trip.

When my sister asked if I was excited about going to Honduras, I said, “No, I’m anxious.”  And I am.  I feel unprepared.  But I also know that it will be worth it.  Of that I am sure.

What’s really hard about this trip, and even hard to write about, is saying goodbye to my grandkids for a year.  When I first thought about doing this trip I figured now was a better time since the grandkids are mostly at ages when they wouldn’t remember my being gone anyway.  Yet, as my departure grows near, the doubts grow stronger and my resolve weakens.  Am I being selfish by taking all this time for myself?

Ultimately, I have to focus on the positive.  My grandkids have parents that love them and take good care of them.  They also have other grandparents who are very much involved in their lives.  They will be fine.  I will be too, but I will miss them.

Comments (14):

  1. Lori Liguori

    June 28, 2016 at 16:36

    Great post, Tim!!! I think you might need a social story!!!! I know everything will be OK! 🙂

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      June 29, 2016 at 09:29

      I can always count on you for a social story!

      Reply
  2. Millie

    June 28, 2016 at 17:40

    Nice reflection. In my head, I thought, “Anxious is good but he is prepared and just doesn’t know it.” CU in Aug.

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      June 29, 2016 at 09:30

      Yes, I’m sure it will be fine. Already having an adventure just getting there.

      Reply
  3. Sharon Eash

    June 28, 2016 at 17:45

    You will be in our prayers – each time you post it reminds me to pray for you! Adorable grandchildren! I had no idea—too long since we have talked I guess! Blessings to you and may peaceful thoughts to fill your mind. <3

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      June 29, 2016 at 09:31

      Thank you, Sharon. It has been awhile, but our families will always be connected.

      Reply
  4. Paula M Agins

    June 28, 2016 at 18:52

    In my heart I know you will be just fine! Being anxious is good, it keeps you alert and on your toes! You leave wonderful gifts to all you encounter………and they will leave you gifts for a lifetime. I think you are showing your beautiful grand children that life is theirs for the taking. In my prayer every day.

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      June 29, 2016 at 09:32

      Thanks, Paula! It’s always good to look on the bright side. I need to be alert to avoid losing all of my possessions.

      Reply
  5. Julie Aquilizan

    June 28, 2016 at 22:48

    Your grandchildren are beautiful and fortunate to have you for a grandfather! You are a positive role model about how to live life to the fullest, take risks, learn about other people and cultures, give to others and to love! If you don’t have Face Time, I highly suggest it. Last summer when we were in India, I could Face Time with Dale and my family and it really felt like we were together, in the same room, having a conversation. Check it out!

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      June 29, 2016 at 09:36

      It’s your adventurous and outgoing spirit that inspires me! I’ll be thinking of you often. No Facetime, but I do have Skype which I plan on using.

      Reply
  6. Gail McLeod

    June 30, 2016 at 22:27

    Hi Tim,
    I look forward to your posts while in Honduras.
    What an exciting adventure for you and for those that will be following along!
    Safe travels,
    Gail

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      July 1, 2016 at 14:54

      Thanks, Gail! It’s great to hear from you.

      Reply
  7. Elaine Temel

    July 1, 2016 at 09:29

    Good advice above..you are being very open and aware of your concerns. I am amazed! Someday I will take an adventure. Keeping you in our prayers.
    Elaine, Derin, Miles & Dylan

    Reply
    • Tim Flanagan

      July 1, 2016 at 14:56

      Thanks, Elaine and family. I appreciate your thoughts and prayers. And I’ll look forward to hearing about your adventure!

      Reply

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